


In the Dark

by kaeorin



Series: Loki's Lullabies [76]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Avengers Movie Night, Avengers Tower, Awkward Flirting, Comfort, Domestic Avengers, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Fluff, Idiots in Love, Movie Night, Nervousness, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Pajamas & Sleepwear, Pre-Relationship, Stark Tower
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-10
Updated: 2020-06-10
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:35:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24636184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaeorin/pseuds/kaeorin
Summary: Wanda convinces you to join a spur-of-the-moment pajama party and you, despite your misgivings, go. But so does Loki.
Relationships: Loki (Marvel)/Reader
Series: Loki's Lullabies [76]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1678240
Comments: 12
Kudos: 243





	In the Dark

It was, all things considered, maybe one of your silliest hangups. Especially here in the Tower. The others walked around in their pajamas without a single problem. Those who wore pajamas, anyway. You got the sense that Tony always slept either in his clothes from the day before or possibly naked. But others wore their pajamas into the kitchen in the mornings, and no one seemed to have a problem with it. 

Some mornings, you even caught yourself admiring how your teammates looked in their comfy clothes. There was just something about seeing someone as fearsome as Natasha Romanoff in sleep shorts and a black tank top, or Bucky Barnes with plaid pajama pants slung low on his hips and a snug t-shirt stretched across the muscles of his chest. It almost felt like a privilege. They’d make their way down into the kitchen, sometimes still half-asleep, and get a cup of coffee and then sit down at the table. There were no facades first thing in the morning, no pretenses.

But, for all your appreciation of your teammates, you still couldn’t bring yourself to wear your own pajamas around the Tower. They were personal. They were private. Pajamas, for you, were meant expressly for wearing to bed. When you got up in the morning, one of the first things you had to do was change into regular clothes. Granted, now that you were all more or less locked down inside the Tower, your regular clothes tended more towards comfortable lounging-around clothes, but they were still clearly different from your pajamas.

Anyway, you didn’t have the same presence as Nat or Bucky. You tried not to get too down about yourself here, surrounded by literal superheroes, but your entire presence kind of felt like a “pajamas” kind of presence, as opposed to the strong, confident, self-assured presence that the others hand. It wasn’t the end of the world: not everyone could be a trained assassin and, anyway, sometimes the team needed “pajamas” people for things that the assassins couldn’t do.

Life had kind of just ground to a stop lately. Most of the missions were on temporary hold, and, when there was something that absolutely could not wait, they sent the super-soldiers instead of the regular human people. Everyone was going a little bit stir-crazy. Maybe that was why there was a slight increase in the number of group activities: dinners, workouts, movies. You had already turned in early, mostly so you could change into your pajamas and try to turn off your brain a little. These people were your friends, but they were also your coworkers, so you always kind of felt like you had to be On around them. When you were closed safely inside your room, you could let the stress and the fear and the uncertainty wash over you. The world had changed. There was no going back to the way things were. In the light of day, you were mostly happy about that, and could hope that the change would be for the better, but at night, your pessimism got the better of you.

You were already pretty well into your anxiety attack when you heard someone knock on your door. Briefly you considered ignoring them, maybe letting them assume you’d already fallen asleep, when you heard Wanda call your name in a singsong voice. So you rose to your feet and tried not to sigh as you went to open the door to her.

She smiled brightly when you did. “We’re having a pajama party!” she said in a conspiratorial whisper. “Come join us! We’re going to watch a movie. Bruce already made just...obscene amounts of popcorn.”

“I don’t know...” This really didn’t sound like something you were comfortable with. No one ever mentioned the way they only ever saw you in normal clothes, but if you joined their “pajama party” fully-dressed, maybe you’d draw too much attention. 

Wanda pouted a little and reached for your hand. “Come on! It’ll be fun! You have to see what Thor wears to bed. You’ll _die_.” She stepped back a little to take in the sight of you, and then grinned again. “You look cute! Pleeeeease come with me?”

It was hard to say no to her. She was the member of the team that you were closest with, and there was very little that you wouldn’t do for her. It was hard to believe that she could be so carefree and open, with a history like hers, but she’d warmed to you quickly and...that was that. Even though this whole thing made your stomach feel tight and uncomfortable, you felt yourself nod at her. She rewarded you with still another brilliant smile and started to pull you out into the hall. You resisted just long enough to grab a zip-up hoodie from the back of your door. That was a little bit like street clothes. She gave you a Look when you pulled away to put it on, but then took your hand again and all but danced through the hallway to the living room.

Very few people looked up as you joined them. That made you feel a little better. And everyone _was_ pretty clearly wearing pajamas. Even Tony had a set. Wanda pulled you down onto an empty couch, and Bruce offered each of you a bowl of popcorn. She was scanning the room, looking for someone. “Where’s Thor?” she asked at last. “He’s not changing, is he?” She sounded scandalized.

“He’s getting his brother.” Tony was the one to answer, and he didn’t sound thrilled. “We told him to leave him alone, but he wanted the whole team to be here.”

Oh, man. Loki. Your heart beat a little bit faster. He mostly kept to himself. He stayed quiet most of the time, and spent very little time in any of the common spaces. It made him a bit of a mystery, really. You were way too fascinated with him. When he did venture out of his rooms, you often caught yourself staring and, much to your horror, he sometimes caught you too. But you liked looking at him. He was objectively gorgeous, and that grumpy, sullen air about him only enhanced his physical beauty for you. You’d always had kind of a thing for outcasts. You’d always wanted to befriend them, get to know them, make them happier. He was no exception. It was hard to blame the rest of the team for being skeptical of his presence in the Tower, but you hated that Thor was the only one who tried to involve him.

You pulled your legs up onto the couch and told yourself that you were _not_ trying to hide. Literally no one in the room gave a shit about what they—or anyone else—was wearing, but the pattern of your pajama pants seemed to scream for attention. Sweatpants would have been fine, or leggings, or just about anything else, but there you were, in your oldest pair of flannel pajama pants. Maybe they’d turn off the lights when they started the movie. That might be more comfortable.

“We’re here! We’re here! Thank you all for waiting!” Thor’s booming voice entered the room well before he did. When he finally stepped inside, Wanda nudged your side urgently to get you to look at him. When you did, you couldn’t hold back your shocked laugh. He wore an oversized t-shirt with the faces of the entire team. His pajamas were Avengers-themed. 

He must have heard you laugh, because he turned towards you and struck a pose. “I’m glad to see you, my lady. Do you like my sleepwear? I keep you all very close to me when I sleep.”

“That’s so sweet!” You studied the image printed on his chest. Sure enough, almost every last one of you was there, lovingly hand-drawn by some kind of cartoon artist. It looked great. But someone was missing. “Where’s Loki?”

“Ah, he’s coming! It took a great effort, but I’ve convinced him!” He sounded proud. You couldn’t blame him. From what you could tell, Loki was hard to convince to do anything he didn’t want to do. If he was truly on his way, instead of hiding away in his room or ducking into another empty room in the Tower somewhere, maybe Thor really was the most powerful Avenger. You smiled to yourself, and shook your head.

“No, I mean...on your shirt. Loki’s not there.” It looked like a fairly old shirt, but Wanda was there, so, by all rights, Loki should have been too. Thor looked down, holding the shirt out a little bit so he could get a better look.

“My lady! You are correct!” He sounded upset. “I’ve never noticed that before. I need to find a new one.”

As if on cue, Loki strode into the room. It was hard not to stare. His hair was pulled back out of his face and tied into a messy bun at the nape of his neck. You’d always been kind of a sucker for the so-called man-bun but _damn_. He was dressed simply: just a dark green t-shirt over a pair of black sweatpants or something, and though his clothing covered his body, it did it in a way that also seemed to reveal so much. True to form, he met your eyes—and caught you staring—and smirked a bit, in a way that made your tongue feel too large for your mouth.

“Don’t bother yourself, brother,” he said as he took a seat on the very same couch as you, just on the other side of Wanda. “I don’t care to have my likeness to be nestled against you as you sleep.”

In a way, you were happy that he sat where he did. It was hard to know exactly why you cared whether he saw you in your pajamas, but you did. And he couldn’t, not sitting there at the other end of the couch. The others carried on a bit, discussing whether it was only fair for Loki’s face to be on Thor’s shirt if the rest of you were, but your hearing was mostly blocked out by the sound of your heart.

At long last, someone hit the lights and Tony started the movie, and things went quiet. You were still thinking about Loki more than you really should have been. It wasn’t right to think about your teammates like this, but his sweats had rested exactly perfectly against his hips. The hem of his t-shirt kept his skin hidden, but all he had to do was stretch just a little bit and you knew you would have seen parts of him that you’d never seen before. And his hair? Absolutely ridiculous. Images flashed by on the screen but you couldn’t make sense of them. Someone was pursuing someone. It seemed too early in the film for anything to explode, but a bright flash of orange lit up the room anyway. Odd.

Wanda leaned closer to you, and you didn’t notice until she was whispering in your ear: “Are you okay?” She sounded like she knew too much already. As far as you could tell, her abilities did not include mind-reading, but she had always been able to tell too much just from looking at you. You barely turned your head towards her, only enough to try to direct your voice expressly at her.

“I’m fine.” You probably didn’t need to be a mind-reader to hear the waver in your voice. Maybe your street clothes served as some kind of shield against things like this. Loki had been beautiful for as long as he’d been in the Tower, but you’d never been so clearly affected by him before. 

She closed her hand around your forearm and shook you gently, just enough to make you look at her. She was skeptical, and you couldn’t blame her. Just beyond her face, you could make out Loki’s. He was sitting back amongst the cushions and wore a bored expression as he watched the screen. You forced your eyes back to Wanda’s face before he could catch you staring. She was grinning. She’d caught you. You tried not to roll your eyes at her before fixing your gaze solidly on the screen. You weren’t a teenager anymore. You didn’t need friends giving you a hard time about your crush, especially when you already knew it was ridiculous. She sought out your hand in the darkness and squeezed it, and you told yourself that it was supposed to be an apology.

The movie pressed on. You’d been too distracted in the beginning to really understand what was happening at this point, but watching the moving lights was better than anything else you might have done instead, so you kept it up. After a while, Wanda squeezed your hand one more time but then let you go, and moved quietly to stretch out on the floor. No...you didn’t like that. She was supposed to be your buffer. She was supposed to keep you from staring at Loki. You narrowed your eyes at the back of her head in the darkness, but of course she didn’t turn around. When you stole a glance at Loki, he was also looking at her strangely. He looked up, then, and shot you a questioning look, but all you could do was make your eyes go wide and shrug at him.

Ah, of course there was a love scene. Someone on the other couch hooted as the actress unzipped her dress and let it slide seductively to the floor. Now you had a bit of a dilemma. If you kept your eyes fixed on the screen, you’d be watching very carefully as the actors went through their Hollywood love scene, and you’d never liked those. If you looked away, you were afraid that your eyes would drift to places they didn’t belong. Also, if anyone happened to look your way and see you pointedly avoiding watching the screen, you were afraid that they might think you were being a baby.

God, this was excruciating. Was this a widespread release or softcore porn? Finally, you scooped up your bowl and Wanda’s, and collected several others from your teammates on your way into the kitchen. A popcorn run had enough plausible deniability, didn’t it?

You opened a few packages of popcorn and stuck the first one into the microwave, then watched through the door as it spun in mesmerizing circles. It felt like it was easier to breathe in here. Logically, you fully understood that the movie was so much more interesting that your dumb face, so in all likelihood the others didn’t even remember that you were there, but damn if it didn’t feel like all eyes were on you. When the microwave dinged, you pulled the popcorn out and poured it into the first couple of bowls. 

A hand reached out to grab a handful, and you just about tripped over yourself in your haste to get away. The owner of the hand laughed quietly, and the sound was rich. Deep. It was Loki. You fought _hard_ to maintain some semblance of competence as you opened the plastic wrap around the next bag and put it into the microwave.

“Did I startle you?” He asked you like he knew the answer already. You couldn’t blame him, really. You drew in a steadying breath and squared your shoulders before turning to look at him.

“A little.” Your honesty surprised you. Some small part of you wanted to pretend that he hadn’t, but you knew better than to lie to him. He smiled at your words, like maybe he was also surprised, but appreciated the answer.

“Forgive me.”

Oh, lord. You prayed to every god that you’d ever heard about that he’d never find out what that voice did to you. He could say anything to you and, as long as he said it in that same, low, amused tone, you knew you’d just go ahead and do it. You felt yourself smile weakly at him, but then furrowed your brow. “Alright. This time only.”

You knew that he saw right through your attempt at firmness, but, rather than exposing you, he accepted it with a slight nod of his head. While you waited for the second bag of popcorn to finish, you tried to think about anything except how close he was. If you wanted, and if you had the courage, you could have reached out and touched him. Your traitorous brain conjured up thoughts of how he’d feel: whether you’d be able to feel the warmth of his skin through his shirt, the angle of his bones through his waistband. You were a fucking _mess_. You were a member of a team comprised mainly of Earth’s Mightiest Heroes and you were undone by unfamiliar comfy clothes. Without really meaning to, you let out a long, slow breath that puffed your cheeks.

“You don’t wear your hair down often.” His voice seemed even quieter than it had before, hushed, like he wanted to make sure only you could hear him. It took you a moment to make sense of his words, but, when you did, you looked over at him. Did that mean he paid attention to you and how you normally wore your hair? When had he ever paid attention to you? It was true that you normally kept your hair pulled back away from your face, in a braid or a bun, but no one had ever mentioned it before. He met your eyes for a moment, but then lowered his gaze. “It’s nice.”

“Thank you.“ The words were barely a whisper. You cleared your throat and opened the microwave to retrieve the next bag. “Ah…I like _your_ hair tied back like that. Makes it easier to see your face.” Mm, maybe that was too much. Loki hadn’t gotten _that_ personal. Your face burned, but you did your best to pretend it wasn’t. You portioned out the popcorn into the bowls like everything was normal.

“Thank _you_. I’ll keep that in mind.” He sounded amused, but at least there wasn’t much discomfort in his voice. You’d count that as a win. You started to take the empty bag over to the garbage can, but Loki reached out to stop you, and did it himself. 

When you tried to gather up the bowls into your arms, of course it was a little more difficult to carry them all now that they were full. Without hesitation, Loki stepped in to take the rest of them in his arms, and the two of you carried them back into the living room and handed them out. Wanda was no longer on the floor. Instead, she’d taken your spot, leaving her old spot next to Loki untouched. She look at you despite the daggers you tried to shoot her way, and happily took your last bowl out of your hands when you sat. 

Before you could make a fuss, Loki returned to his seat and nudged you with his bowl. Oh. _Oh_. When you looked at his face, he was smiling faintly with his eyes already fixed on the screen. You relaxed into the cushions behind you, all too aware of Loki’s presence next to you, and took a handful of popcorn.

If your hands brushed, from time to time, when you both reached for popcorn at the same time, well, surely _that_ was to be expected.


End file.
